Breaking: Jennifer Garner Learned ‘the Only Person That Can Change’ Ben Affleck Is Himself After Their Split…. See More

There are “so many” mantras that Jennifer Garner counts among her favorites. “They all come from my mom, which means they all come from, like, Mrs. Ingalls from Little House on the Prairie, or Anne of Green Gables, or the Bible, or all the above,” the actress shared on the November 12 episode of the “Lipstick on the Rim” podcast, which is hosted by her pals Molly Sims and Emese Gormley. “‘Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes in the morning’ is one. ‘Happiness is your own responsibility’ is vintage Pat Garner.”

Another belief 86-year-old Pat shared with her famous daughter? “‘Don’t marry a man thinking you can change him,’” Jen further shared. That’s something the 13 Going on 30 actress, 52, who divorced Ben Affleck in 2018, seemingly learned the hard way. “Jen worked hard to save her 10-year marriage,” which endured Ben’s alcohol addiction and a nanny cheating scandal. (Ben denied having an affair.) An insider exclusively tells In Touch, “But Jen has learned that the only person who can change Ben is Ben.”

also opened up about finding peace and acceptance in recent years. When asked how she can remain “so positive,” Jen insisted that’s a fallacy. “I don’t all the time. You kind of are where you are, and you just have to find the friends who can handle that for you,” she said, reminding Molly about the “many times I showed up at your house and just started crying because you were safe.” Despite her reputation as one of Hollywood’s most bubbly actresses, Jen’s realized that “we have to allow ourselves to not be perfect all the time. To not be in the mood all the time, to not be smiley.”

These days, she explained, “I give myself a lot of grace. I’m like, ‘Welp, I couldn’t do it. This was not a day where I was all things to all people.’” She has, however, learned to withstand and recover from difficult moments and crushing challenges — most recently the death of her father, Bill, 85, earlier this year. She’s modeled that fortitude for her and Ben’s kids, Violet, 19, Fin, 15, and Samuel, 12, whom she hopes will “continue to find their resilience,” she’s said.

Exercise, validating her feelings and leaning on her support system help her handle the hard days. “I’m a big believer in ‘movement is medicine.’ I’m happier when I push the blood through my veins,” Jen said. “If you wake up and you have a cloud over your head, I acknowledge it. I’m like, Ugh, I’ve gotta get this cry done. But more than that, it’s … just being around people with whom you can laugh and who laugh at you. I have wonderful, incredible women around me.”